Depression: When it feels like no one gets you, life is hopeless and you're inexplicably angry all the time.

A letter to the dear one’s who suffer from depression or seemingly unmanageable anger, pain and loneliness. I see you. There is hope.

For anyone who has or does or knows someone who has or does suffer from Depression or other mental health disorders I wrote this for you with love.

My dear friend, I know how it feels to be angry all the time and you don’t exactly know why. Maybe it’s because the people around you are annoying and hurtful and bringing you down. But deep down you know that’s not the main reason.

I know how it feels to feel empty, hollow and sad. To want to be with people, but the second you are with people you just feel annoyed by them. To feel so alone because even though you want to be happy and have friends, you ultimately don’t know how to access the feelings required to be happy and be friendly. I have been there and many times I am there. Trying to love and be loved, but the smallest actions of others sets me off and makes me angry or hurt or annoyed.

I feel happiest sometimes when I’m alone because there is no one around to disappoint or to be disappointed by . No one to piss me off or get on my case. But then when I’m alone I’m sad sometimes too because I’m lonely and I want to be with people, they just bother me so much.

I wish I knew why, I wish I could fix it. I try to be nice, but will power only goes so far when the anger, the pain and the overwhelming emotion is just so strong. People don’t get it, they say why can’t you just be nice or why are you so angry? But if they felt how I felt they would be amazed at my restraint.

Why are my emotions so out of control? Why do I sometimes feel like I have no emotions and I’m dead inside? How do I make it stop? Do I even have the strength to try? I feel like it’s hopeless sometimes because I clearly can’t accomplish anything in life with these issues stopping me.

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But I also know there is HOPE. I’ve done it before and I can do it again. I’ve been nice to people before, I can do it again. I’ve been promotes at a job before I can do it again. I’ve succeeded at something I cared about before, I can do it again. I found a hobby I enjoy doing, I can do it again. I’ve found friends before, I can find them again. I’ve been fun and lovable and funny before, and I can do it again.

Anything you’ve done once you can find a way to do again. And anything you’ve never done you can learn how to do.

It’s hard because the battle is in your mind . It’s invisible to everyone else, but it’s very real and with just as much carnage as a real battle. But, it’s a battle we can win. It’s a battle we can fight. It’s a battle that we will overcome!

It may never be fully over and it may never go away completely, but it will get easier . It will become possible for us to manage. The most important thing is learning the techniques to fight this battle by talking to people who have been there.

The biggest misconception about happiness is that it just comes when you have a good life. The fact is happiness is a fleeting emotion, and like all emotions it sometimes is stopped because of our own thoughts. If you have depression your brain or hormones may be sending off the wrong signals causing you to feel sad or angry for no reason. But you can override that programming with your thoughts. It takes practice. But it’s something we can learn to feel and experience.

I read books about how to have a positive mindset, how to manage depression, how to improve your mood and deal with anger. I go to therapists, life coaches, pastors or anyone who has some experience and can talk to me about what I’m going through. I watch YouTube videos about psychology and mindset. I listen to podcasts (Brooke Castillo if you want to change your life!) and audiobooks . It can be boring, it can be a slow process, but it gets better overtime.

Every time I talk to someone about how I feel, I feel a little better and the burden is lifted . Every time I dare to trust someone I grow inside. Every time I learn a new technique I get a little better at feeling happier in my life. I hope you know that you are loved and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. Don’t give up on finding happiness and learning to love yourself.